The Time Aspiring Writers Spend on Writing-Related Activities

January 23, 2019 § 7 Comments


jared bilskiBy Jared Bilski

  • Tweeting funny comments, often involving coffee, along with the #amwriting hashtag – 8%
  • Posting photos on your Instagram of a coffee cup and a leather-bound journal; a coffee cup and a laptop; or a coffee cup, a leather-bound journal and a laptop along with the #amwriting hashtag – 6%
  • Obsessively checking your #amwriting tweets and Instagram posts for engagement and responding when necessary – 11%
  • Posting long, meticulously proofed posts to a variety of Facebook writing groups, posts which are ostensibly about a ridiculous technical concern you have about your incomplete (novel/memoir/screenplay) but are really ways to remind others you are, in fact, a writer even if you feel like you are a fraud with a dogshit idea for a (novel/memoir/screenplay) – 17%
  • Pensively smoking hand-rolled cigarettes – 7%
  • Crying – 11%
  • Crying while reading David Foster Wallace while pensively smoking hand-rolled cigarettes – 9%
  • Letting people know you’re a writer during completely unrelated conversations – 10%
  • Research (i.e., stalking the social media accounts of famous authors for whom you harbor great resentment and jealousy toward because if you had even a third of their connections and trust money you would be the one talking to Terry Gross about your latest novel instead of writing these goddamn #amwriting posts) – 3%
  • Finding creative ways to convince your parents big things are happening with your writing while also casually asking them for money – 16%
    ____
    Jared Bilski
    is a writer and comedian who lives on a creek in Collegeville, Pa. He’s written for The Washington PostMcSweeney’s Internet TendencyFatherly and a bunch of websites that no longer exist. The brand/third-degree burn on his left shoulder is a permanent reminder of the stupidity of his youth. Find him on Twitter at @JaredBilski.

 

Tagged: , ,

§ 7 Responses to The Time Aspiring Writers Spend on Writing-Related Activities

Leave a Reply to Shabnam Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

What’s this?

You are currently reading The Time Aspiring Writers Spend on Writing-Related Activities at BREVITY's Nonfiction Blog.

meta

%d bloggers like this: