About a Microwave
March 16, 2017 § 11 Comments
By Dinty W. Moore
I am reviewing a blank book. The pages are entirely empty – not a single word. That makes it nonfiction, yes?
Because there is no fiction printed within.
And the title is Alternative Facts.
Facts are nonfiction, yes?
This is important, because the Brevity blog only reviews books of nonfiction.
So here is my review:
It is an interesting book. A quick read. The paper is nice. The cover feels solid. The entire package fits neatly in your hand.
By the way, royalties from sales of the book are being donated to ProPublica by the publisher, Abrams. ProPublica is an independent, nonprofit newsroom that produces investigative journalism in the public interest.
So there we go. More facts. More nonfiction.
I am beginning to feel pretty good about my book review. I might write some of my good feelings down – in the book, on the blank pages (shown to the left).
Something like this:
“I’m feeling very good about my review.”
Except, hold your horses. (Not literally! “Hold your horses” is just a metaphor.)
But it seems I’ve told a lie here.
So is this review now fiction?
Or is it back to nonfiction, as soon as I admit to the lie.
I don’t know. Ask D’Agata.
But there are, after all, words in this book, but only a very few, printed on the very last page:
Two days into the Trump presidency, the thesaurus gained a new synonym for falsehoods, lies, distortion, deception, and total BS (take your pick). The phrase “alternative facts” has sparked laughter at its absurdity, but also disbelief and fear that this administration shows no hesitation in blatantly rewriting the truth to fit its narrative.
In response, this journal offers the opportunity to ground yourself in reality, to collect and record in writing whatever you wish, and to record your own alternative facts.
Pretty cool, huh?
Here’s an Alternative Fact: I am being spied upon, at this very moment, by my microwave. Someone in Russia is watching me write this review. He or she, I can’t be sure, is quite bored by it all.
Dinty W. Moore is founding editor of Brevity magazine and this blog as well. He is being spied upon, at this very moment, by his microwave
Dobro jutro! (Not someone in Russia, a bit more down and to the left. Slovenian.) 😀
Your tin foil hat has ya covered, Dinty!
I have to wrap my entire house.
Reblogged this on CL Pauwels at Large and commented:
I would never try to say anything better than Dinty W. Moore, because he is so good at what he does.
Reblogged this on Her Headache and commented:
Hahahaha, wow. This microwave thing is really catching on.
I was just taking a break from doing my tax return, but unpacking Mr. Moore’s review took longer than I expected. It led me to Jennifer D. McDonald’s indispensable essay on truth. And my Latin is pitiable so then I had to look up ars longa vita brevis.
We could spend the next four years pondering the issues raised in Mr. Moore’s review, and I have a feeling we will.
I guess, given the topic, I should say I am using a pseudonym.
Thanks, whoever you are.
“Hold your horses” I saw a movie once where this phrase led the hearers to respond “We don’t have any horses”. Cracked me up.
Delightful. Thank you!
Perfect. A book for whatever you make it become; always have liked those. Make your own reality–everyone else does, anyway, sooner or later since we all experience subjectively each thing that happens. But Trump, that’s another story, not a good one.